I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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