Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
