There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Randomize