before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
if only i could text you this smell
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
