Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
