I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
