Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
