I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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