TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
My vagina just clenched in fear
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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