he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
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