That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
