I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
