I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
North Korea, Best Korea!
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
