i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Randomize