school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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