So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize