just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
You're breaking my sexual little heart
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
