I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
