U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
