she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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