The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
