these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
