Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
