i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
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