Swine flu. Run for my life!
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize