no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize