that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
