Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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