I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
he puts the penis in happiness.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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