I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Randomize
