It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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