is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
