her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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