i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
I'm just crazy horny about you
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
