hotel room ftw
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
