I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize