i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
