GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
