yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
