i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I just had sex on a roof
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
