we're blogging at a bar
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I feel great
I just peed on a car
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
