I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
