A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
