lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
