On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
How does one acquire holy water?
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
