After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
