I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
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