I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
