haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
