dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
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