Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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